Love Bomb!

to me, there aren't enough words to describe how AMAZING this project is. everything, all of it is so wonderful. this project is already changing lives and it's only been (officially) active for about two weeks.

the objective? change an individual's life with something as simple as comments. you know how people in the blogging world say or tell their readers how much they mean to them? it's definitely true and sometimes just one little sentance in a comment can change your day or week around. but what would happen if not only one encouraging or loving comment from a total stranger appeared on your recent post, but about two hundred did?

your life would change.

you would have been love bombed.

"Love Bomb is a project of ItStartsWith.Us. Once a week we come together to drop hundreds of love bombs (in the form of blog comments) for those who need it most. Subscribe via email on our Tumblr (dropalovebomb.tumblr.com) or follow us on Twitter, and join us in our missions. It only takes 5 minutes a week! "

here are just a couple testimonies of recent love bomb missions to show you how this project really does change your life and help you to realize how many genuine, good people are actually out there:

"I received a HUGE outpouring of love & support today from the @dropalovebomb team, and it literally could NOT have come at a better time." - Laura

"This is just a very quick post to acknowledge and thank everyone, both who I know and who I don’t, who made the effort to reach out and encourage me particularly this difficult week...Needless to say, I am completely blown away."- Sienna

one of my good friends, lauren, who wansn't superwoman-like enough, took charge of this project in the beginning of july and here is her mission statement from 'ItStartsWith.Us':

'The concept is simple. We change the lives of those desperately needing hope, love, care, & encouragement – together, once a week, for five minutes.

We are all busy, I know this. But the next time someone asks you what you’re doing with your life, I bet your answer isn’t “cleaning up,” “going grocery shopping” or “sitting at a desk.” I know that all of you want something More.

A homeless man asked me a couple days ago what my life objective was, and without hesitation I replied, “to love people.” It’s taken me a long time to get here. To the place where that is my default answer, where it comes naturally. Yes I want to get married, yes I want to live where I want to live, there are activities and careers that I dream about. But what do I want to do with my life? Love people.

And it’s a genuine fight to fit what you’re doing with your life into your daily routine.

This is why I’m pouring a good chunk of every day into Love Bomb, and why I am the new Team Leader for the project. I want to help you fit what you truly care about into your daily or weekly routine.

I want to see all of you grow into the place where you are content to simply respond, “I want to love people” when you are asked what you’re doing with your life.

Come on guys, you are bloggers. This is what we do. We comment to show our love.'

(if you want to see how since july 1st, lovebomb has changed lauren herself, read her recent blog post.)

please lovely followers and friends, sign up to be a part of the lovebomb team and change peoples' lives. it only takes a few minutes out of your week; and while loving on someone else who truly needs it, you feel your heart and soul get a little bit warmer.

YES! i want to be a lovebomber!

only outgoings

^via tumblr

i've been getting some really nice mail lately, but unfortunately my photos didn't turn out very well, so those'll have to be for the next mail post. anyway, i know it's not a lot, but this is what i've written and sent out in the past few days and some of these are my most favorites ever. oh! and i will be putting up a counter sometime this week of incoming and outgoing mail, and wanted to know if you'd like to see postcards seperate, or just jumbled in as just general incoming/outgoing..? let me know when you comment!

^all the mail waiting to be taken to the post office.

^a LONG overdue reply to miss ilona. i adore this sea creature envelope, don't you?

^reply to sir aaron in california.

^two postcards for the lovely and florida-loving marianne.

^my reply to the wonderful carolee. the back isn't as pretty as the front unfortunately.

^a reply to a great new pen pal.

some lovely new posts are on their way and i'm hoping to fit two more in this week; cross your fingers! thank you again to all who have been supportive; i know through a computer screen, it's hard to know how real a person is being, but i do want you to know none of this is fake and it's because of the few people out there that still comment or reply to an email or write a wonderful letter that keep me going and let me know i'm thought of in some way or another. THANK YOU and i promise to do my best in continuing making this a lovely, nice, fun blog for all you brilliant readers.

lovelove,

- L

am i the only one?

last night i wrote out this long, tear inducing paragraph of words and thoughts of my life lately. but decided not to post it in light of a new day and hopefully new beginnings. while i am still very emotionally sick and feel somewhat alone as far as people around me go (minus family of course; but when you're around a group of people, the same people for almost every day, every week, you need new surroundings), i am trying my best to fix it all now and hope that you all can bear with me while i scarcely post and talk about anything interesting anymore.

so...instead of a long, drawn-out article of sadness, here's a song that i have loved ever since i was seven and now love even more since in the last 5 years have been able to relate to it:

"There is no good reason
I should have to be so alone
I'm smothered by this emptiness
Lord I wish I was made of stone
Like a fool I lent my soul to love
And it paid me back in change
God help me am I the only one
Who's ever felt this way?

A heart that's worn and weathered
Would know better than to fight
But I wore mine like a weapon
Played out love like a crime
And it wrung me out and strung me out
And it hung years on my face
God help me, am I the only
Who's ever felt this way?

Now my sense of humor needs a break
I see a shadow in the mirror
And she's laughin' through her tears
One more smile's all I can fake

There is a wound inside me
And it's bleeding like a flood
There are times when I see a light ahead
Hope is not enough
As another night surrounds me
And it pounds me like a wave
God help me, am I the only one
Who's ever felt this way?"


hopefully this will be the last post like this for a good while. so sorry for not keeping this a happy, lovely blog and not posting often. i'm going to try and work on that this next week.

much, much love to you all,
- L

what's love got to do with it?

more than anything, i hate seeming like a person who is depressed. who is failing, who is so tired of life. but i guess i don't care anymore, i guess. somehow i've found myself at nineteen, hating everyone, almost, because of the realization that i'm alone. yes, i have family; but i spend SO much time with them, i find myself volunteering to go get milk, which takes ten minutes, just to get out of the house. of course i love my parents, but for the past year or so we've been on an on and off basis of getting along and wanting to rip each others' eyes out. gosh, i feel so incredibly naive to even talk about this, but you know what, it's my life and i'm trying to get over being really ashamed of it. it'll be a good year or two before i can get out of here, live life my way and not have to worry about the consequences. having no job is fine with me until it comes time to do anything or go anywhere. working at dead end jobs has no appeal to me in any form and i'm so tired of looking to get 'we're not hiring', 'we're already cutting back on hours' and 'it's not season, come back in september or october'; oh dear lord, i am so sick of hearing those three things. so much so that i just don't care to go out and drive around all day getting rejected at most places i do not even want to be at let alone work at. i hate money. i hate how it controls life and america so much. it's so disgusting how greedy everyone here is. who gives a shit if it's 'un-american' or wrong to say how horrible our country has become, but it's true. maybe if we were still under the rule of a monarchy and prime minister, we wouldn't be in so much trouble or have too many issues with handling money and our economy. look at how much more the euro is worth in comparison to the american dollar, that's proof enough. none of that matters in the fact that i feel alone, but it's just been on my mind a lot lately. i want you all to know that i appreciate your kindness and care through comments and letters and postcards, everything. please don't ever doubt that i'm grateful; those things mean the world to me right now and brighten my day up more than you'll ever know, really. a lot of people and bloggers say that, but i truly mean it. while it's awesome to get ten or more comments, just one that's significant and lovely will make my week and really make me smile and happy. so please, do not think that my loneliness is in relation to you at all. or that i'm ignoring you by taking a break from letter-writing the past two or three weeks. it was kind of un-planned, but necessary to clear my head and sort of get a grip and figure out why i was writing and whom i was writing to, so on and so forth. you guys are awesome, end of story. but despite all the amazing pen-friends i have, i am alone. sure, i have one..maybe two people locally that are friends and really care about me and love me. but i don't have people around enough to have a life with them and laugh and talk and create memories with. i live in a town that is where people over the age of seventy belong october through april and middle & high schoolers belong may through september. there's no where for me. i belong no where. while i am independent and can do fine on my own, that doesn't matter in the fact that there is nowhere for me to go and be. while i am very much so a believer, a christian and grew up in that environment, i'm taking a break from it because every church i go to doesn't fit and seems to be focused in the wrong areas for me and/or the teachings aren't my cup of tea. those of you who've ever searched for a church or are religious, know what i'm speaking of; those of you who aren't, just skip ahead, i don't mind. while i love God and know that He loves me, i'm having a hard time dealing with the fact that he's made my life so ridiculously annoying, frustrating and always seems to add on something to the already huge pile of crap i have to deal with every day. a lot of which i just don't want to talk about on here, because whether it's believable or not, i do want this to remain a happy blog and not put a bunch of personal drama into it. while i know there are people who care, and again i really love you for that, we all prefer to read happy, lovely things and not be brought down any more than we could be already or get pulled into this world where there's nothing positive. while i have discussed this topic before, i keep coming back to it like a bad habit. it haunts my thoughts at night and i dream of sitting alone, at the top of a hill, looking down on everyone i've ever considered a friend just laughing and talking with one another but never even glancing at me. not once. and i look off into the distance that could be my future and all i see is a mirror. reflecting the only person that i can depend on? i don't know, but i'm starting to feel like i belong on shutter island. will anyone glance my way? call me? send an email to me or be the first to carry out any contact at all? or will i choose to just be the pathetic person begging for some kind of attention and heart from people, as i have my entire life? do we all really grow up to have no friends like i've heard is true? or is there the possibility of having relationships that aren't formed from the workplace or relatives. is this just a dream that gets inside your head in your high school years, that you'll have friends throughout your whole life and you won't always feel lonely when you're by yourself. or like me, have been by yourself almost every day for a year?

i'm not asking for the sympathy vote or wanting to seem like a person who just wants attention, etc. but i do ask that i'm kept in your prayers or in the back of your mind where the good, positive thoughts go. i'll be needing both if things don't get better.
- L