instant cinnamon

recenty, i got back into flickr. my pro account is still expired and i've yet to FULLY get back into the swing of it, but i do love just exploring all my contacts photos and finding new photostreams that have gorgeous photos. like, the one i'm about to show you.

*cinnamon's photostream has been a favorite of mine ever since i joined flickr a few years ago. her photography is so simple and lovely; very athereal almost.

upon exploring flickr again in the past month or so, i've noticed a lot more instant photography on her stream; which i love. the fujifilm instax 210 is such a cute camera and despite the instax mini being more popular, i love the idea of the wide instant photograph. and all the customer reviews on amazon seem to be positive, so that's a good sign!


the fujifilm instax 210 camera.

*cinnamon's lovely photographs: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven.

all this to say that, my vintage polaroid land camera (210, with bellows.) has really been ticking me off lately. no lie. it just doesn't seem to want to co-operate with anything these days and never produces my photos in focus or what i actually centered images on. it might also be that in the past i've mostly used black and white photos and the first and only other time i'd used color was some vintage polaroid film i'd found on ebay before i knew you could buy it much less expensive through amazon and fujifilm.

SO, i think that i'm going to purchase the 210. (!!!) i only have amazon prime - with free 2-day shipping - for a little bit longer and have a $20 amazon card burning a hole in my pocket. so, after buying the camera and the film, i'll actually be only buying the camera, $1.50 less!

what are your thoughts on *cinnamon's beautiful photos? instant photography? any tips on how to help me out with my old polaroid land camera? have you tried out these new instant cameras? pros, cons? your comments are much appreciated!

lovelovelove.

EDIT: last i looked at the mini - it was $80 and after going to amazon to grab that link it's now $71. based on your experience, which do you think is better or will last longer..? i think the 210 is still pretty neat, with the wide photos, but the mini is pretty darn cute. input, please!

a letter to someone i once knew

Dear old friend,

why did you ever change? why did our friendship just disappear? those are some questions i've been feeling like need answers more than anything these days. you were once the only person i could really count on and could talk to anything about. you were the person who taught me life lessons and would tell me i had potential when i most certainly thought i did not. why did you ever have to leave my life? WHY? do you know how much it breaks my heart to hear you talk so highly of people who you've known for a handful of weeks when i've known you almost my whole life? put aside the fact that those people could be well deserving of love or are really amazing; we're talking about our friendship here. since when do you love this or have that interest when i would hear the exact opposite feeling for them? do not mistake these questions and sentances for complete hatred of who you are now; i think who you've evolved to be is a wonderful and beautiful person, but where in this universe is the old you? can she not fit into your hectic life anymore? yes, i miss you, sometimes more than anything if i have a day where i think 'oh, SHE would understand this' or 'i wish i could hear her opinion on this issue' and it still kills me, makes my heart hurt SO much, to know i'm no longer important in your life. but please, tell me where the old you has gone? where are her interests and opinions? her passions and talents she once filled her life with? did you just toss them aside like me? no longer important or relevent like our friendship? where is the girl i met, after so much time had passed of different states, moves and houses that re-kindled my love for people and life? where did her murder occur? don't look at me, all i remember is a vague point in the past where you stopped existing in my daily life; i have no clue where you decided to kill off your old self and become this new person. like i stated, this new woman is lovely, i like her; but when you decide to change who you are, that doesn't mean that the good parts of your past can't change with you. i'm not talking staying up super late and only getting two hours of sleep before work talent, i'm speaking of photography like talent. yes, it's still there, but not as strongly. where's the girl who used to carry a camera around with her everywhere? i'm not going to go into more detail because i honestly don't care to shed more tears over your lost existence and the friendship that i want to see again, but don't see how it will re-occur. and i do feel like i might have already said too much. but i wanted to get this letter out there, in the open. because i feel like it's been a long time coming and i can't just decide to let it go. some people say that's what you have to do with things like this, but being stubborn is a trait i will never kill off. so, whether you know this is about you or have no clue as to why i've written all this out, i hope you at least got to read it. because maybe someday, something in you will click and i'll see the old friend and maybe even the old friendship i once knew.

Sincerely,

a broken hearted old friend

midnight love

it's midnight, on a monday-tuesday and i'm currently in love with the following:

- 'friends' & 'how i met your mother' re-runs. they're the best cure for a head cold.
- also good for a head-cold? lots of haagan dazs sorbet. my pocket-book is so angry with me.
- dinosaur toes' new items added oh-so-often. despite not being able to afford it all, i just love looking at it. danielle is so talented, such a beautiful person inside & out and i'm so thankful our friendship is growing as blog/twitter buds.
- this photo of my caela. she's so gorgeous, it's insane.
- oh my goodness, this video is SO adorable and SO funny at the same time. you will die, no lie.
- recent vogue covergirls natalie portman & kristen stewart. they're so gorgeous and two of my style icons.
- lady sarah of sadie designs is awesome. plain and simple. i love her blog, her etsy shop and following her on twitter. i have a feeling she'll be a good blog-bud for a long time.
- april's recent blog posts on her room and general life situations; it's rare anymore to see bloggers do what blogs were intended for: journaling. photo, inspiration and random blogs (like mine) are awesome, i adore them, but it's nice to have a few journal-esque blogs mixed in, you know?
- these photos of amy & danielle. seriously- how killer are they?!
- this watch in brown from anthro. $40! i'm odd. and think that's a lot of dough to spend on a watch. despite actually needing a watch, haha.
- french macarons. obsessed. it's official. thinking about making my own after seeing this lovely post on coeur de la recently.
- glee soundtracks. enough said

inspired by micaela, as most of us are, to cheer myself up on saturday after coming down with a head cold i tried on some of my old red lipstick and snapped a few webcam shots. pardon my shirt, i took them right after work and i wear plain mens t-shirts; they make me look so boxy, i hate it.

so not to end on a debbie downer note, guess what i'm waking up SUPER early for in the morning? THE ACADEMY AWARD NOMINATIONS! so excited, you have no idea. there's always a few surprises and i'm so psyched to see who's chosen and who could be snubbed this year. you'll probably be reading this after whomever is announced, so! tell me what you think of the nominees and who you think should've been nominated, who'll win, etcetera!

lovelovelove.

(top photo by yours truly)

a photographers daughter

back in december, my dad got a new SLR digital camera for work and wanted to test it out amoungst different lighting, colors and background. i grew up with film cameras up until about ten-ish years ago and still prefer film over digital. to think that someday, it could even be discontiued like polaroid film is such a fear of mine; and i hate that so many people my age and even younger will never know what real photography is. but! i won't go on that rant, at least not for this post, haha.

rewind back to the topic of discussion. my dad got a new camera, wanted to test it out; and i was heading over to anthropologie to do a little bit of shopping, asked him if he wanted to come. (and mentioning that williams and sonoma is right by anthro, that helped too, haha.)

- before i was born and a short time after, my dad along with my mom had his own studio and was a wedding photographer as well as still life and portraits. if i've rarely said before, i am a photographers daughter and it's one of the many things i'm so proud to have inheireted from my dad. -

my dad had never been to anthro before, despite me being there probably 50% of the time over the Christmas season. so, kind of out-of-place looking in a store full of ladies, he walked around for about an hour just taking photos of everything. exclaiming things like 'loook at how they refurbished that!', 'that couch is awesome!' and 'i didn't know those were measuring spoons, so neat!'.

so! even though it's a bit late, i did want to show you some of the lovely photos he took. there were almsot 100 of them, but here's some that were my utmost favorites. all of the photos were taken my dad and a little bit of editing by yours truly. hope you like them!

seriously?

my state of mind and mouth at the moment.



yeah, we'll leave it at that.

(if the video doesn't work: click here.)

excitement

right now, i'll probably be at work, working a long morning shift. so excited to get up at six am, SO excited! (enough sarcasm? oh well...)

but i have a lovely thing to look forward to when i get home - the golden globes!

if you met me AFTER awards show season last year, let's just say that you've been warned. it gets obsessive; but not ugly unless you're not one for 'famous people being awarded for playing make believe' as i've heard it described.

yesssss, i love that part too, being an avid before-ceremony red carpet - on e! nonetheless -viewer and rating all the glamorous dresses as well.

but honestly and truly, i LOVE films and everything that goes into making them. when the awards for cinematography, costume design, score and screenwriting roll around (and other etc. somewhat boring awards.) i get just as excited and nervous to see who wins as to what actors, actresses and movie win the big awards of the night.

my favorites thus far have actually been all of the big contendors - 'true grit', 'black swan', 'the kings speech' 'the social network'; but if i had to pick a favorite, it would probably be 'black swan'. it's stunning visually and natalie portman's performance is INCREDIBLE.

the nominations for the academy awards are announced on the 25th, bright and early and i am SO excited to find out the nominees. despite it looking as if 'the social network' will win best picture this year, i'm secretly, strongly rooting for 'the kings speech', as i think it's the best all around film in acting, cinematography, writing and directing; 'black swan' is my favorite personally, but when owning up to THE best, i think it's 'the kings speech'.

your thoughts on awards shows? the academy awards? what about the big contenders this year - seen them/have a favorite? let me know! i'm more than interested.

no good title

somehow, someway, all the inspiration i've been receiving lately has been disappearing, not being put to use. so, i'm aborting that form of action and plan to blog, photograph it, take a note, tweet or write it down in a letter every time it comes along. i've been here many other times before, saying i'll commit to something and it always goes away. well, honestly, i don't know how long it will stick, if it will. but for the first time, i actually feel like i want to change. like i want to blog every day or that i could get up earlier in the morning and not feel miserable. like i could save more money or keep up with letter writing more than i have been. it's just a feeling, that hasn't been said out loud yet. but i know it's there, and i know that these next few months are going to be amazing. somehow, yes, i can just FEEL it. there are finally good, solid, caring, wonderful people in my life who inspire me and make me smile every single day. finally enough inspiration flowing in every day that make me want to blog and not care about how many comments the posts get. currently, people are making resolutions to loose weight or 'get healthy'; where i, finally feel at home and not pressured ALL the time to be thinner. there are days where, like most women, i hate my body and never want to leave the house, but those days are few and far between anymore. it's not at full capacity yet, but something is changing within me, making me want to change, to try and plan things and figure out the plan for all things in my life.

there are a few people that need some appreciation, real thanks for being amazing; for inspiring me to live life to the fullest, every day.

danielle. her blog has REALLY been inspiring me lately. it's so lovely, sweet, adorable and funny. her and her awesome husband should have their own sitcom. plus, she uses her own photographs for every post she does, and they're GORGEOUS photos at that. if you follow her on twitter, you know how lovely she is. such an inspiration as a blogger, person and friend. thank you, miss biscuit, love you bunches.

amy. for just being her, really. every day she'll tweet something or take a photo of something that makes you smile. miss amy is one of the small handful of people whom helps me to look forward to the future, of maybe having a family. because she leads her own life, yet has a husband and family too; which many women say they have and do so happily, but seldom do i believe it. not with amy though, she never gives me any doubt that life can be awesome. thank you, schmamey, you're the bee's knees.

sarah. her jewelry is SO gorgeous and awe inspiring. as well is her blog. she takes great, simple photos and writes the stories of her life so well, you're instantly hooked into the latest post. if you haven't visited her shop or blog yet, i urge you too right away; the past few days it has been one of my main sources of inspiration. thank you sarah, for the lovelieness.


micaela & marianne. the lechuga twins have been too lovely and compassionate to me lately, i adore them so. micaela being one of my best friends and marianne slowly becoming one. over the last two weeks or so i've exchanged emails and phone calls with both of them almost consistently and it's been so wonderful, something rely on maybe. knowing their support and love isn't more than an email away. m & m, thanks so much for being good friends.


danielle. following her on twitter has been a blessing, really. she's such a sweetheart and ever since following her, i've been reading her blog nonstop. always knowing it was there, but somehow forgetting to read it all the time like others before. now though, i am addicted. she always posts the most lovely and inspiring photos, links to great shops, and great writings on day to day life with her husband. she's an inspiration in liking to amy in that she's living her own life, doing what she loves, yet has found love and kept it. when people have been married a long time, it gives me great hope; so many marriages end and i'm so happy to have found a blog that celebrates a strong marriage in contrast to a woman's other interests as well. thank you lady dinosaur, for being you.


april. somehow, i feel incredulously connected to this lady. she blogs about such relate-able things and never ceases to give me a laugh or good cry after reading her blog. honestly is her best policy and i adore it. maybe someday we can explore france or the whole fo europe together since this time didn't work out as planned; i know she'd be an awesome traveling partner. thanks april, for being honest and endearing always.


april. reconnecting through twitter has been lovely. out of nowhere sometimes, i'll get a sweet or caring response from her and i always know she means what she says. so glad to live in an age of technology, moving away from each other has been a bit easier with the loveliness that is phone calls, email, twitter and skype. thank you april, for getting back in touch & being sweet.

paige. despite not having a real conversation for a while, you as a wonderful human being always inspire me. even when we disagree. i'm so happy just to know you, as your life in general is an inspiration to keep on going through life no matter what get's thrown in your path. as with those people that mean a lot to yourself, there are no exact words to say other than thank you. you rock socks all over the world miss baker.

these articles written by lauren and found via twitter. articles that really hit home and yes, changed my life a little bit. no doubt i'll have a glass of water by my bed tonight, ;].

&& the impossible project, moreso than ever before. 35mm photography owns my heart, but polaroid is most definitely the mistress, if it needs a label.


THANK YOU. i love you. talk to you soon.

and the winner is...

congratulations april!

will be sending out your dvds next week!

thanks so much to everyone who entered my first giveaway, it really meant a lot!

my blog anniversary is monday and if i get 200 followers by febuary, i'll have another giveaway. planning on either an etsy or anthropologie related one..you know me. ;]

hope everyone has a fantastic weekend!

guest post over at dolce vita!

guest-posting over at micaela's blog today!

PS: only two more days to enter the giveaway!

contentment, finally

as i sit here in this restaurant, just by myself, some water and my computer, i realize something.

i'm content.

my whole life, because of being a member of a nomad family, i've been alone. playing, singing, seeing movies, sitting in coffee shops, shopping..everything.

always, i've wanted more, someone physically there. people to build memories with and have times to look back on in laughter or tears. people there to say 'hey! do you remember that time...' as we sit and wait for a movie to start.

yes. they're there. five wonderful people whom i love more than anything because i do and it's not a obligatory or blood related thing. but they're not here, physically, in the same town.*

but as i sit here. just me, reading and writing all alone with the elevator music, it's almost like a little oven timer went off in my head.

i'm content. just as i am, by myself.

would i love some company? of course. nothing would be more brilliant than to have all the people i hold most dear close by all the time. honestly though, i think it could ruin it. not the friendship of course, but a balance moreso. if EVERYONE, close friends, good friends, were all living in a 20 mile radius from me...my heart could very well combust.

it would be too much!

not saying i like it this way, all the time. most certainly do i get lonely or wish that my bank account was one of a millionaires and i could fly to see everyone, every week. more than anything, do some days i just want to hug someone and tell them that everything's going to be alright, in person. (and vice versa.)

in 2011, that's something i'd really love to achieve. to have 'met' everyone i hold most dear, have those memories made; and to take roll after roll of film, and have those photographs of captured time forever.

but for this moment, on the first day of the year, i am honestly content. finally.

*(one out of five people i love and trust most is in the same city as myself, which i think helps the balance.)